If you have ever been sexually abused by someone who was in authority over you, know that you are not a weak person. You were innocent. Whoever exploited you is a predator. Predators are looking for ways to fulfill their selfish desires. They’re irresponsible and selfish. They seek out people they want and scheme to get what they want from them. Their scheming involves finding unprotected areas to manipulate, in order to get close enough to you, to get what they want out of you. Everyone on this earth has at least one weakness, or a need, and it makes everyone vulnerable. No one is immune from that. It’s worse if you’re unaware. That does not make anyone a weak person. It makes you innocent.
You were innocent! Not a weak person!
You were innocent! Not a weak person!
You survived! You are a strong person!
Your life is not over. It’s just beginning. You are even more valuable to the world now.
View the predator, and the situation, like a game against an opponent who was playing dirty. You’ve already won the first half by surviving – getting through it.
The second half will involve your healing.
This part of the game will be difficult. I encourage you to seek out someone to lean on. You can still do it by yourself, but someone by your side, who you trust, could ease some of your burden.
During your healing process, I first encourage you to get counseling. Counseling will help you get through the process efficiently. Diligently, seek out a licensed professional, a pastor, or the like. Ask for help with this. Do not give up here.
Resist the urges to want to make the predator feel remorseful for what was done. Remember predators are selfish, irresponsible, and probably mentally unstable. Your efforts towards this would be a waste of your energy. Don’t give them any more of your attention. Their two minutes of fame is up!
Concentrate on you.
Concentrate, and do, what you need to do to keep excelling as a student athlete.
Concentrate, and do, what you need to do to advance to the next level of your life.
You got to keep going, even when you don’t want to.
Lastly. . .
Vent! Vent! Vent!
I encourage you to vocalize the pain you feel to yourself, a counselor, a friend, or someone you trust. For example, if you are hurt because people let you down, talk it out. If you are hurt because you felt people ostracized you, talk it out. If you are hurt because you felt abandoned, talk it out.
Please be advised that your emotions will probably get plenty of exercise, and your quest for answers, peace, solace, happiness, protection, and/or the likes, may bring you closer to God. When you’ve reached the end of the game, you will be more powerful than ever. You will be stronger emotionally and spiritually. You will have the power to help others recover from their abusive situations and/or guide others on how to recognize these predators.
The world is waiting for you.
For those of you who have not been abused, I have something for you in my next article. Stay tuned.
Visit my website geralinelhandsome.com (Athlete’s Voice to Integrity) for more information about how to become a super athlete.
About the Author: Geraline L. Handsome has developed a passion to help high school and college athletes of team sports discover their identity. She is a former Women’s Basketball Player for the University of Alabama at Birmingham (UAB). There she earned a B.S. degree in chemistry/mathematics. She has a MBA from the University of Phoenix. She is an Environmental Scientist and the mother of two. She is the author of the book Sins of One Woman’s Mind and was a Huffington Post Contributor.
Geraline L. Handsome has developed the Creating the Super Athlete Course (Audio/Video), a product designed to help parents and coaches help their athletes develop attitudes and character that will enable them to perform better in their sport, in the classroom, and in public.
